Not long ago I had a very enlightening conversation that I have found myself revisiting from time to time. I do not revisit this conversation because it was a particularly pleasant experience; rather, it was quite the contrary: this conversation was somewhat hurtful and most definitely humbling. Yet, as uncomfortable as it was for me, this conversation was also a positive and insightful experience, because several insightful observations had been brought to my attention that I had not otherwise made on my own. And even while this insight came as somewhat of a jolt to me, it was illuminating nonetheless.

Without getting into the particulars of the conversation, I will suffice it to say that I learned several important things about myself as a result of that uncomfortable exchange. This conversation opened my eyes to patterns in my life that I had been unintentionally, yet actively, perpetuating. I suddenly became more aware of certain bad habits that I have had and the impact they have on my life. And as a result of this awareness, I was also able to finally see the solution to certain problems that have been otherwise quite difficult for me to resolve.

So, even while this conversation was somewhat unpleasant for me, it really was a positive and important experience because of the awareness and potential growth that I had gained as a result.

And so it seems to go for many of us, does it not? Sometimes, it seems, life has a way of holding up a mirror for us to gaze into. And sometimes, looking at ourselves in such a way can be a difficult thing to do, because we may not like everything that we see. We may be startled by a sudden awareness that we had not had before. We may realize that there are hard truths that we must accept and own up to, and doing so is not easy, for there is nothing easy about admitting that we are, quite often, our biggest problem. If you are anything like me, your natural tendency would have been to resist this process and instead become defensive. To explain or excuse yourself. To shut down, to guard your heart, and protect your ego. Yet, if you are able to resist these temptations and instead gaze into that reflection of yourself, and ask yourself what is to be learned, you will grow and you will evolve. Because as difficult, uncomfortable, or unsettling as these experiences may be, they are quite valuable to us, for what we learn about ourselves during these times serve as an important reminder that while we may in fact be our own problem, we are also our solution to our problems.